Memories can be such a strange and powerful thing.
Have you ever had a memory that you weren't sure was yours? Maybe it was something you saw in a movie or read in a book? Or you confuse a dream with reality? I'd like to think instances like that are common for people other than myself. Usually, it only takes a minute to distinguish what happened when and to whom but for the past few years, I've had this one memory that has taunted me endlessly.
A while back, I was sitting on the couch and I had this instant, random flashback that I wasn't even sure was real. I remembered shoddily drawing pictures of clothes and outfits in fifth grade and charging my friends money to redraw them to their liking for pennies. I told the mister about these memories but all the while, wondered if this was truly something that happened. Later I presented these memories to my mom who confirmed that this was, in fact, something I did.
My memory of this was grand. Just like someone remembers catching the biggest fish in the pond when it was really just the size of a perch, I remembered drawing pages and pages of outfits but figured that in reality it was probably only two or three pages max.
I knew I'd never truly know how much I drew or anything more than that weird, vague memory floating around in my head so you can imagine the unbelievable shock when I ACTUALLY FOUND THE DRAWINGS!!!
You may remember a while back, my sister and I climbed into the depths of dusty storage boxes at my parents' shop and relived our childhood. We *thought* we had gone through and brought down everything that had been put up there that we wanted/needed/was stored up there from various house moves but with an impending business move in our near future (!!), I wanted to dig around up there one more time to see if anything was left and boy was there! Not only did I find an actual box marked 'Briana's Clothes' (oh boy, was that a fun one!!!) but I found my childhood crafts with projects in process, fabric scraps from Barbie clothes I attempted to make and my (hilarious) drawings.
When I pulled out the packet of drawings, I literally gasped the loudest gasp I think I've let out in years! I was FLOORED. Following that were probably several words that would burn your ears when I started flipping through and realized that 'Fashion for Drawing' spanned FIFTEEN pages and TWO-HUNDRED drawings. It WAS as grand as I had remembered it! AND at the back of it all was an order sheet, WITH ORDERS! Granted the orders were from my best friend (Hi, Tracy!), her sister, my sister and my mom but I had orders! ha!
What really, REALLY blows me out of the water though is how much of the same person I am now as I was when I was ten years old. I was a young crazy cat lady which I am most certainly now; I was a teacher (another post on 'Studies' to come one of these days) to my sister and Great Granny (I also found my multiple teaching notebooks this go around) which I am actually paid to do now; and I was a creative entrepreneur which I passionately pursue now.
When people ask the age old question of 'What did you want to be when you grew up?', I can never think of an answer. I now think that's because I was already who I wanted to be and I was already on that path of being that person, if that makes any sense. If you're still reading this far (long-winded, odd post, I know!) you may think I'm a bit nutso or maybe you are nodding your head in agreement but finding these drawings was one of those AH-HA moments for me. It's like strange things just clicked into place somehow.
I don't know quite how to explain it all but just know, to me, this was all big. Even bigger than the hammer pants in my drawings.
And no, I will not be taking any Fashion for Drawing orders any longer ;)